Ahh, your first time…what man doesn’t remember who he was with, where he was, and how mind-blowing it was…just like you knew it would be.
Uh guys, I’m not talking about your first woman; no, I’m unfortunately referring to that first time you received a membership solicitation in the mail from AARP! When it happened to me, you could hear my groan from a hundred miles away. Turning fifty is a big enough event unto itself; seeing the AARP return address on that envelope even before opening it is being slapped in the face and that, my friends, is a whole other ballgame.
Here’s the dichotomy with this whole issue…I’m aware, as are most other 50 plus males, that AARP is a terrific organization. Upon reading that first appeal to join, you’re presented with a multitude of benefits “once they gotcha…” However, to this day (remember, as I compose this post, turning 57 years of age is quickly approaching), I have not pulled the trigger and joined. I know what you’re probably thinking; it’s just sheer vanity getting in the way of rational action. But hey, did I mention that I just cannot pull the trigger?
Give AARP credit: they know the meaning of “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!” While they take care not to overwhelm you with mailings, they are definitely following a model of periodic consistency. Deep down, in my heart of hearts, I know I’ll eventually come to my senses and take advantage of the privileges of membership, and that this day is coming sooner rather than later.
So here’s my question: Do you understand why I haven’t joined thus far? Am I just acting immaturely? Is it just plain foolishness? Please let me know your thoughts, because for a guy who prides himself on thinking through most situations in a concise and clear manner, I’m totally confused.
-Neal
